Personal Responsibility

When we take responsibility, we admit we are the ones responsible for the choices we make. We, not other people or events, are responsible for the way we think and feel. It is our life, and we are in charge of it. We are free to enjoy it or disdain it. No, we are not responsible for all that happens to us, but we are responsible for how we think, feel, and act when they happen.

many people associate responsibility with duty and obligations, which, in turn, are thought of as burdens. But personal responsibility is not a burden, it is a blessing. This becomes clear when we understand that PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY IS NOTHING OTHER THAN THE FREEDOM TO CREATE OUR OWN LIVES. Yes, responsibility is equated with freedom and power. Once we awaken to this fact, we become liberated and empowered. Once we become aware of this truth, we shed our victim mentality and gain the power to transform ourselves.

If a change in your life is warranted, why not begin by recognizing that your present situation is not the result of your genes, parents, education, job, luck, timing, health, or environment. Rather, it is the choices you have made and the actions you have taken that have brought you where you are today. Change your choices and actions and you will change the results that follow. This understanding is the first step in personal transformation. The second step is the action that follows. Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.

What action should we take? Start by taking a personal inventory. That is, examine your life to learn the extent that you are either already taking responsibility or evading it. This is best done by asking yourself a series of questions and writing the answers for later study. Here’s what I mean. Do you ever say to yourself or others any of the following? Life is so unfair. I’m unlucky. No one wants to help me. It’s not my fault that I’m the way I am. Life is an endless struggle; there are too many burdens to bear. Terrible things are always happening to me. My parents (spouse, friends, coworkers, boss, health, the weather, or the political situation) make me depressed (angry or frustrated). I feel overwhelmed and helpless. Some people get all the breaks; I’m just unfortunate. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired. There’s nothing I can do; it’s just the way the world is. I can’t succeed because of the corrupt government, blood-sucking corporations, greedy employers, and back-stabbing coworkers. I’m unsuccessful because of the prejudice (age discrimination, sexism, jealousy, hatred, stupidity) of others. I would be successful if it weren’t for the idiots holding me back. Self-help books, positive thinking, or the advice of others can’t help me.

Can you see where I’m going with this? All the above thoughts express the mindset of a self made victim. Instead of taking personal responsibility and taking charge of one’s life, that kind of thinking is used to blame others or life for one’s own failures. That type of thinking is dead-end thinking, self-defeating thinking.

Yes, it’s easy to shift the responsibility and blame others or events. But what good is that? All it does is keep us in a rut. We cannot make any real progress until we admit to ourselves, “Only I can hold myself back. Only I can stand in my own way. Only I can help myself. Only I can take personal responsibility. Only I can transform myself from a victim of circumstances to a reasoning, choice-making, action oriented person. Only I can make the decision to stop acting like a victim and start taking charge of my life.”

One of the first ‘people’ we greet each morning is our reflection in the mirror. Don’t we want to be accountable, answerable, and responsible for the life we are creating for it? By accepting that responsibility, we unleash great power and transform ourselves. It may be convenient for a caterpillar to have so many legs, but it remains earthbound. It is far better to make a dramatic change and transform ourselves like a butterfly, so we can take flight and explore a new world.

So this is a very exciting time for us. As you all know we moved to Alabama a few years back and needless to say we hated it. After everything we did down there it really screwed us financially. As you know we came back to Charleston. Our home. We are happy about that. We have been working to get ourselves back where we were before we moved to Alabama. We have had some struggles and set back. We have had some personal issues, professional issues, family issues, and other things. I was starting to feel like we would never move forward.

But no more. We are moving forward. Starting with me going to school. That was a big leap for me. I am working very hard at it. I still have a long way to go, but it was a step in the right direction. Next, Robert was chosen for the next CT5 class. Which happens the first week of April. So he will take the class, take the test and hopefully pass. That is another step in the right direction.

The most exciting step is the step of buying a house. My mother has decided to move up state and she is selling her house. We are buying it. She is not giving it to us, like some people may think. We are buying it. I am so excited about taking that step to home ownership. There are so many things that Robert and I want to do to a home, but can’t because we have never owned. We will be in our new home come the end of this month.

I look at my life and I think about where Robert and I were this time last year or the year before that. I am so Thankful. I am thankful for where we have been. I am thankful for were we are and I am thankful for where we have yet to go.